Or rather, seven severe to mildly frustrating characters. Happy Top Ten Tuesday!
1. Lee Fiora, from Prep by Curtis Sittenfeld
Always my go-to love-to-hate girl, but seriously Lee, could you be more self-hating and judgmental?
2. Pamela, of the eponymous novel by Samuel Richardson
Pamela, how could you marry your would-be rapist? And how could you agree to those egregious marriage terms? Oh, go jump out a window!
3. Mary Musgrove, from Persuasion by Jane Austen
Oh Mary, are you sick? Do you need your sister to scrub your floors and take care of your children? Poor, poor Mary. (Actually I totally love Mary and her ridiculous hypochondriac and hypocrite ways. But. Frustrating, definitely).
4. Winterbourne, from Daisy Miller by Henry James
Can you get over yourself and your double standards? While you're worrying about whether or not Daisy is a "nice girl," should you maybe consider whether or not you're a "nice guy"?
5. Hamlet, from that Danish play by Will Shakespeare
Get thee to a decision already.
6. Friar Laurence, from that play set in Verona by Will Shakespeare
Sure, I could be frustrated with those silly youths Romeo and Juliet, but frankly, I don't think either of them had the IQ to know any better. So Friar Laurence, I'm looking at you. Why oh why didn't you consider that it was maybe a bad idea to fake a death where melodramatic teenagers were concerned?
7. Edward Ferrars, from Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen
Edward, you seem like a nice dude. But why did you wait so long to break it off with Lucy and tell Elinor you loved her? You could have avoided so much trouble, and preserved your fortune into the bargain, like a proper Austenian hero.
I'm sure there are many more frustrating characters, but no more I can think of at the moment.